13 years ago
Blessed

Please help, I can't stop crying.?

My bf for 4 months says he needs a break and space because it's to much for him right now. He claims to not have enough emotions and is not affectionate. But I have seen different. and said he's not ready to feel all that yet. It's not me witch I thought it was that it's him. I asked if he came here to break up with me he said he doesn't think that it's a break up cause he doesn't like to break up with people he likes. So I asked what does he expect out of this space and so called non break up and couldn't give me a direct answer so my next question was is it another chick or do you want to see other people he said no cause if that's what he wanted he would be doing it now. He thinks we need to deflect ourselves. I asked him why did he make me his girl then and he said because he thought he can change at least with me because he likes me so much. with the being affectionate and emotional. I wish I was a guy just for 1 day so I can understand. I'm so confused, I don't know if this is the beginning of us breaking or he wants to slow down or if he has a chick or chicks in mind that he wants to fu**? Please keep it real I really need to know what this means he won't give direct answers and I need to know what I'm doing with my life. I don't want to wait then look like an *** at the end if it's another chick, and if it's not that will things get better for us? all opinions needed.
Top 10 Answers
13 years ago
luvslyric
Favorite Answer
FIRST OFF its not as bad as it may seem or as every one is trying to make it seem. just because he is taking a break from you doesn't mean that he is going to break up with you. some times a break really is only a break. just think about it this way most guys don't have half the experience girls do when it comes to relationships so the moment they think there is a chance for them to really like a girl to the point where they could get hurt the guy gets this crazy idea that he should run like hell. now i have to be honest with you four months really isnt a long time so there is a chance he could be thinking that you guys spend to much time with each other and it feels to much like hes married . especially if this is a young guy. THE BEST THING FOR YOU TO DO IS GIVE HIM HIS SPACE. don't call as much as you use to .. don't let him see you emotional and just tell your self that every thing will be OK and if its not its his lost not yours. try to keep your self busy so that you wont spend so much time on thinking about him because it will only make you crazy. and what ever you do don't listen to EVERYTHING people tell you because they will have your mind all over the place.
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13 years ago
michi10015
Alright, well first of all take a really deep breath so you can calm down a bit, I'm going to tell you an age old secret...some men are idiots...they always have been and they always will be, they don't think anything like we do, unless you find the right one the one that is meant only for you, and trust me honey he's out there and he's waiting for you just as much as your waiting for him and in my honest opinion what you need to do is go ahead and break it off with this guy, real love doesn't give you pain, and if it is meant to be he'll realize it and he'll come back to you knowing what an idiot he's been, and if that happens and you do decide to give him another chance make sure it's known that you are not a Kleenex, he can't just use you whenever he needs you then throw you away when he's done. Two chances no matter who you I believe everyone deserves a second chance if they screw up the second time around then they're certainly not worth it at all, good luck, and trust me everything is going to be all right.
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13 years ago
Venus Envy
I second Baby-Dymes to an extent. If he says he needs space, don't contact him - It'll push him further away and lessen the chances of him changing his mind once he's sorted himself out. If he doesn't want to break up, he'll make all the moves. When he says he doesn't like to break up with people he likes you could read this in two ways: 1) He has love for you and cannot bear to lose you completely, but has his own issues to work through at the moment which cannot be tackled effectively within the 'distraction' of a relationship. 2) He really doesn't want to be committed to you right now, and wants to **** other women and have you as backup if it goes all wrong or as a bootycall when his new girl(s)are not available. Don't go and find a rebound guy or anything, but maybe spend some time in the company of other males, and spend more time with your friends and do loads of stuff to keep your mind off it and move on somewhat. But leave a space in your heart in case he comes back. Chances are, by the time he's made up his mind you'll be at that place in your life where you don't want him anymore anyway!
1
13 years ago
houston_democrat
Being a guy for a day wouldn't help you understand, because he doesn't understand either. Both of you are running on pure feeling. He is being honest when he says he needs space ... he probably needs to sort out his feelings, and they are intruding on everything. This happens a lot with girls, but he's pretty smart to recognize the situation for what it is. Give him his space, but do not assume he will be interested when he no longer needs space; chances are he will find someone who does not confuse him so much emotionally. If you can accept this, which I do not expect, you will be much happier. If you can move on and put him behind you, you will probably be happier, but there are no guarantees in this kind of situation.
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13 years ago
blank
Hes messing with you,if he liked u that much he would let u know where u stand, hes making u hang on for him, i would say to him that u will wait 2 days for an answer then he must make up his mind, if he hasnt then move on..u deserve so much more than that, u dont wanna be wasting your time and your life with someone that doesnt know if they want you, hes put your life on hold. Get someone that u know likes u and stays with u...hes not called mark is he?...lol...ive had the same problem....dont hang around, u will see in the end that movin on was the right thing to do.
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13 years ago
Dorothy C
first and foremost, PRAY. A very wise woman who was married suggested Proverbs. I'll go one step further and suggest Song of Solomon. Oh, and start a rumour that will put you in good stead and him in poor light. That way, even if it'll hurt you, and I can see that it does, you won't end up looking like an ***! And meet new people. Maybe if he sees you with another guy, he'll realize the mistake. So beat him at his own game. Get a guy before he can get a chick. DON'T do anything with him though.
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13 years ago
Shante
like me and my girlfriends say even though im married and shes in a long term relationship.. **** em... boys will make you cry they will be stuiped that is just how they are... I love my husband but I kow how men/ boys are .. i dont expect much .. but if he did something that I could never get over or wanted to take a break.. I could tell when he;s done .. I would go make it painless as possible and start over... you should try .. say goodbye.. Forget about him.. start moving toward a new future!
0
13 years ago
Anonymous
No offence but you seem to be abit paranoid about other girls and Id assume you might be abit intense with him, maybe he just needs some breathing space, he does seem to like you alot so take a deep breath calm down, and when he comes back to you (which he will trust me) take it slow with him and be all loosey goosey
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13 years ago
Trisha
you need to tell him that you need to understand what this is. ask him, if he likes you so much he needs to help you understand where this is coming from. if he cant give you an direct answer then honey, you really don't need to wait around on him. theres plenty of fish in the sea, and you just might find you a shark.
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13 years ago
bo2thejangles
it's really possible that he wants to break up, but if he meant what he said he probably is going through something right now that he can't handle while also dealing with your relationship or you. just try to give him some space, it's probably not you.
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