12 years ago
Anonymous

Christians, is it bad that I'm more close with my friends than my family?

I just feel like I can relate better to my friends...emotionally and especially spiritually. My sister and I had an argument/discussion the other day about why we're not close and its been on my mind ever since. I told her that I feel we don't have anything in common and that I don't hang around her much because of her attitude and negativity and mainly because we're living different lifestyles. I let her know that I didn't hate her or anything (I do love her), but I let her know that she's into some things that I try to stay away from (I'm a Christian and I feel that there are things we have to stay away from in order to maintain our walk with God). For example, she had me in the car with her and her friends while they went to go pick up weed. I told her that if she's going to be doing that stuff then I don't want to be around it b/c if we would have gotten pulled over I would have went to jail with them....that's how our conversation started. She felt like I thought I was better than her and I really don't, but at the same time I don't like being around that type of stuff. Christians are supposed to love everybody, but the bible does mention that we should be a witness but be separate from certain things/people Anyway, we agreed that we would try to work on it, which is fine. I just don't know if its really possible to be close if we're living different spiritual paths. Like...how can you maintain a good relationship with the people in your family that don't know Christ?? I don't mind getting close to her, but its just things that she does that make it hard to hang around her. I'm not trying to be mean, I'm just being honest. ***PLEASE KEEP YOUR RUDE REMARKS TO YOURSELF
Top 4 Answers
12 years ago
The_Cricket: Thinking Pink!
Favorite Answer
Why don't you try finding things your sister and you CAN agree on? For example, go see movies together, go shopping, go bowling, go skating, just hang out and talk. You can separate yourself from the stuff that you disagree with, but it doesn't mean not hanging out with your sister at all just because she's on a different spiritual path. My best female friend is what's known as an apatheist (she doesn't know if there is a God or not, doesn't think there is, and doesn't really care to know), and yet she and I can spend hours on the phone or just hanging out in general. My best male friend (besides my husband) is not only NOT a Christian, he's an anti-theist. He identifies himself as a non-theistic pagan. Yet, like my best female friend, I can spend hours on the phone with him, and just hang out with him, without worrying about our spiritual perspectives getting in the way. I have many friends and family members that aren't Christians. The trick is finding your common ground. Do you like any of the same activities, music, or movies? There's your common ground, then.
1
12 years ago
Room 101
It's a tough road to walk. If you say "I would really rather not be present when you do <insert action here>", chances are the person to whom you said it will * immediately * take offense and assume you consider them less moral than yourself. Perhaps it's just better to say, "Please drop me off at such and such a place", instead of mentioning the act at all. Here's the * other * problem with mentioning the act. Do * you * involve yourself in activities that God, not the government, might consider less than stellar behavior? I am speaking of gossip, malice, envy, slander ... stuff like that. It's easy for us to sniff haughtily and say we don't do this or that (the "big sins"), but then we jump right into the muck and mire elsewhere. Be the example of Christian love ... Love God and love your neighbor (which includes your family). This does not mean condoning their behavior, but it * does * mean giving them (or attempting to give them) the same grace God has given to you. How else are they going to see it if not through someone they know well?
1
12 years ago
Jeancommunicates
How can two walk together if they do not agree? Stay away from your sister but keep inviting her to come to church with you. Or keep telling her about Jesus. Don't harp on her smoking weed because she already knows that you disagree with it. Show her a better life and that life is in Christ. You are to be a light in this dark world - so shine!
3
12 years ago
Anonymous
you can choose your friends but you can't choose your family
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